yr 1 sem 2 results May 26, 2007
Posted by dot in Daily life.add a comment
Got my results back. The only reason why I knew they were going to be released today was cos people around me kept talking about it. I didn’t even bother to find out when they were going to be released til this morning.
Well not as good as last sem, not too good overall. But like I said, I’m not determined by my results. It would be nice to get good grades, but grades don’t really determine my absolute happiness. I mean, I could get really good grades and still be miserable haha.
But it’s really strange. I don’t understand at all why I can get a better grade for a module which appeared to be a nightmare compared to more enjoyable modules. I mean, I think I spent the most time studying for physiology, but got the lowest grade for it. Biochemistry paper was so horrible that I think I had to guess most of the answers and walked away feeling light-headed, but I got an A for it. Right. Anyway that was my only A. Haha. So I really didn’t do well this sem, but it’s my fault haha. Didn’t concentrate for most of the sem cos of a problem.
But hey praise God anyway haha. I still like studying. 
change May 6, 2007
Posted by dot in God.1 comment so far
I feel God molding me, making me into the person He wants me to be. This weekend’s services answered the questions I have been asking for some time. The answers which I really wanted to know but never really hit me. God’s word is alive. At times, it speaks right into your being.
Since last year, I kept asking why I couldn’t feel God’s presence when people all around me could. I was quite frustrated because I knew that I was evidently missing out on something really good, but I didn’t know why. But slowly, over time as I changed, I felt a bit, bit by bit.
Even before this weekend, I think God has been telling me in my heart why I couldn’t feel Him as much as maybe pauline or krystle. I knew my heart wasn’t yielded to Him. My attitude was still rather self-centred, I was double-minded. I had no repentance, no brokenness. I kept looking back. But God is really good. He’s so so good. I would have given up on myself long ago. He just won’t let me go. He has so much patience, and I shouldn’t treat the King of the universe like that. I shouldn’t make Him wait. But I had (hopefully not have) a horrible attitude. And I wondered, why doesn’t God just make me change?! He can just do it, so easy! But Pastor said something which struck me. God won’t make you change your attitude. He won’t touch it. You have to make the decision to change it yourself, because God won’t force Himself on you. He won’t force you to love Him. Cos a forced love is not true love. I wanted an easy way out, a short-cut. There isn’t one.
Why couldn’t I feel His presence so strongly like others? Because I didn’t have true brokenness.
Psalm 51:17
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit,
A broken and a contrite heart—
These, O God, You will not despise.
A broken person has no false front. He has no shell of pride, of self. I felt this shell every time I wanted to get near God. And it’s frustrating. But things will change. I will change. I want more.
Lord I’m hungry May 6, 2007
Posted by dot in lyrics.5 comments
Lord I’m hungry
For a mighty move of God
Lord I’m thirsty
Pour out your Holy Ghost
Lord I want to see the hand of God
Move mightily inside of me
I’m hungry for a move of God
post exam, sentosa, ministry training n service May 5, 2007
Posted by dot in Daily life, God.add a comment
Exams are over…but exams were fun…hahaha at least the bahasa indo paper was fun. Felt like writing a primary school essay, just that it’s in indonesian.
An interesting sign at the exam venue.
Oh well hahaha.. I went to sentosa yesterday with the nus peeps. It was quite fun..just that got a bit sunburnt. Forgot to put sunblock on my face so it’s as red as a tomato now. We played vball, bball, captain’s ball, some went to berenang di laut (swim in the sea). Went for dinner, went to arcade at cine. Played a good game of foosball(table soccer). I don’t feel like talking about this so it’s short hahaha.
Nice sunset at sentosa.
Anyway I went for chorus board ministry training today from 11-1. Chorus board ministry is in charge of flashing the lyrics on the screen during service and other slides, graphics and stuff. The equipment is so sophisticated. Looks quite cool hahaha. We control the stuff from a small room at the back of the terraces, so we get input from monitors in the room. The training was for the 4 of us. Iwan, Emily, Peiling and I. I think those were their names haha. Iwan sounds cool right? Cos it’s an indonesian name! Hahaha..the guy’s from indo. Anyway I was the youngest there.
Yep so can’t wait to start serving. Another training session next week and in 3 weeks time, we get to go observe the action haha. After observing, then we’ll help with the not so major stuff, then go on. A lot of things going on, which we don’t even notice. We just go for service and enjoy it. Do you know they actually have to re-stack all the 8,000 over chairs in the hall every week? I saw them stacking them just now hahaha. I think that’s what they do la. So I’ll serve once every 3 weeks on sat and sun, sometimes for weddings and other events. Cool.
And I’m happy that….Pastor Kong is back!! Finally… He’s been gone for so so long la. Away in Taiwan for missions. But he’s back! For the Sermon on the Mount series. And today was the first sermon on it. It was super good. And throughout, I kept thinking about the people who missed it and how wasted it was. I don’t know why I keep doing that whenever there’s a good service. Today’s service was just great, the praise and worship and the message altogether.
God won’t touch your attitude. He’s Almighty God, but He still gives us free-will, the right to choose. Love cannot be forced. Our God is a God of love. It wouldn’t be love if it was forced. He loves us so much and longs for us to love Him too. So He won’t touch our free-will. And our attitude towards Him. God, I wish I could change my attitude. My flesh doesn’t want to but I need to. How God, how…
